Suggestions for Promoting Positive Human Sexuality Attitudes

Suggestions for Promoting Positive Human Sexuality Attitudes

In higher numbers than ever before, young adults report issues with sex, love, and porn addiction. Although SRI does not treat minors, we receive calls and emails seeking aid and advice from teenagers as young as 14. We’ve also noticed significant development in the number of individuals between 18 and 25 seeking therapy. We’re hearing from concerned parents because many young people still live at home. Television series like VH-1’s Celebrity Sex Rehab and major celebrities like Tiger Woods’ widely publicized sexual issues are likely bringing this issue to the notice of a younger age. While it may be worrisome to think that your child or teen is having problems with porn and sex, they desperately need parental acceptance and support to talk about these concerns, be taken seriously, and be offered therapy if it is necessary.

While there are many reasons young adults seek therapy, what sets this generation apart from other generations is that they were reared wholly in the Digital Age and have likely been exposed to more pornography (via the Internet) than any other. Pornography on the internet, in our opinion, does not constitute a healthy sex education. Except for instructional websites for kids like Scarleteen.com, most sexual content your teen or young adult encounters online does not give a balanced understanding of human sexuality.

Internet pornography provides sexuality devoid of actual connection, proximity, and one’s own and partner’s health and well-being. It will be erroneous and inadequate if this is your child’s only sex education. Pornography creates a fantasy that ignores the full person participating in these sex acts, their history, feelings, and connections. Instead, it promotes the viewer to regard the people involved as objects. Teenagers who use sexual content as a way of self-nurturing, distraction, and comfort can become addicted to it – and continue the problem into adulthood if they are not treated.

Tips for Promoting Positive Human Sexuality Attitudes:

*Talk about sexuality with your children in an age-appropriate manner. Avoid being intrusive and providing information that they did not request.

*If your children have questions about sex or relationships, don’t shame them. If you’re hesitant to discuss the “birds and bees” with your children, give them a book that you’ve read first and contains accurate facts. Lynda Maderas’ teen series “What’s Happening to My Body?” is one of our favorites. Do your research if you don’t become aware of the answers to their queries.

*For your children, model self-esteem, self-respect, and a good relationship. Children learn the most from their primary caregivers, and you have more power than you may realize.

*Install an adult content filter on all of your PCs at home. Ascertain that it is password-protected.

*If your child asks you about Internet pornography, take the time to explain what they’ve seen and put it in context. Please don’t make fun of them for looking or being curious; they might not come to you for aid and advice again.

*When your children begin dating, urge them to get to know and trust someone before engaging in physical activity with them. Know as much as you can about the parents of anyone your child is dating.

*Whatever your religion, morals, or ethics are about teen sexuality, teens who don’t have responsible adults to educate them about safer sex and birth control will often turn to their peers for information, and will often be misinformed, or worse, will not take any precautions against pregnancy and Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs).

If you suspect your teen or young adult is having problems with sex, pornography, or relationships, or if they ask for help, it’s critical to connect them with proper treatment (a counselor certified in sex addiction treatment is best. The indicators of sex addiction may be neglected since it is frequently misunderstood or unexplained.

Signs that your adolescent or young adult needs to be evaluated or treated include:

*A series of brief, shaky connections that frequently overlap (seen more often in girls).

*Falling “in love” frequently, but only for three months or less.

*Complete avoidance of social interaction and relationships.

*Refusal to let a parent see what has been viewed online or on a smart/cell phone in the past.

*Spending midnights in front of the computer or being locked in a room for long periods.

*Insistent irritation and a propensity to place blame on others.

When confronted about their sexual activities, they have a pattern of lying.

*Pornographic image bookmarking or filing that is disorganized.

*Avoid bringing boyfriends/girlfriends home to meet the family.

*When probed about her dating life, she expressed shame and resentment.

*Behavior that is overly seductive and deceptive.

*An obsession with sexuality and language.

*Appropriate physical and emotional boundaries are lacking.

While some of the above instances are characteristic of ‘adolescent behavior,’ others can also be applied to other diseases, such as sexual abuse. You should be concerned if you responded yes to three or more of the questions above. It’s critical to talk about your worries with your teen/young adult calmly and openly and consider referring them to an appropriate therapist for an examination and evaluation if the problem persists.

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